Incentives are rewards or prizes that are given for desired behaviors. In this case they are given for the release of stools or urine into the toilet. Incentives are especially helpful for overcoming resistance when children are locked in a power struggle or control battle with their parents. Incentives replace words. Incentives give a child a reason to end the power struggle.
There are 4 rules that make incentives powerful:
The fourth rule is essential. The child's access to the toy, costume, or other incentive needs to be time-limited. That way your child is really earning a privilege and not another possession. That's the only way to maintain the incentive's value.
How can I get my child to use the toilet for the first time?
Your child has to feel loved. Incentives will not work if you show anger. Lots of physical affection (hugs and kisses) is more powerful than words or praise to let your child know he is loved. Activities with you (playing board games, playing catch, reading, going to the park or on walks) are also important. Not only are they essential for your child's emotional growth and mental health, they also make your child more receptive to following your rules and requests.